What makes a song danceable
By Aaron Wulff
Throughout the years I’ve helped wedding couples dance to every kind of song you could imagine. Sure, most of them have been classic artists like Etta James and Nat King Cole, but along the way, I’ve helped couples with everything from heavy metal thrashers to hip-hop mashups. I’ve seen (make that heard) it all.
Regardless of how much effort you’re going to put into your first dance as newlyweds, there are a few universal guidelines that you should follow. And, if you’re interested in learning some special moves for your first dance, then you’ll want to put in the extra effort to find the right song.
If you just want a casual first dance
Many couples are content just swaying back and forth to a romantic song. In that case, the music world is your oyster. You’ll be free to dance how you want to and won’t have to worry about the tempo, instruments, or quirks of a song.
Work backward from the kind of experience you want to share as a couple and with your guests. Do you prefer a timeless standard or do you want something modern? Are you more of the traditional type or do you want to stand out from the crowd?
One of the most important questions you can ask when selecting your song is: how will it make you feel when you look back at your wedding in 5, 10, or 20 years?
Like anything in popular culture, some songs can stand the test of time while others will sound cheesy and dated almost overnight. When you’re choosing your song, think about how you’ll feel when you’re showing the kids the wedding video or swapping memories at dinner with your friends.
To further narrow down your selection, think about songs that have special meaning or memories for the two of you. Generate a list of possibilities as a couple, then try a listening session together.
If you want to learn some moves or choreography for a first dance
Do a quick search for “best wedding songs for first dance” and you’ll be overloaded with lists and recommendations from the top wedding sites. The truth is, most of these lists are only based on how the song feels or how good the lyrics are.
Unfortunately, many of these so-called “perfect” songs aren’t “danceable” for couples who want to learn to dance to them. And by the way, what does “danceable” even mean?
First, a footnote. Couples have brought me hundreds of songs over the years, and often, after they try to dance to a particular song, they’ll realize it just doesn’t work.
But, that said, in over 20 years of teaching I’ve never talked anyone out of doing a song. Instead, we go over some basic questions I use for helping couples decide if a song is a good choice. Once they “road test” the song with these things in mind, they decide for themselves whether to they want to use it or find a better fit.
The definition of Danceable
Sure, everyone has their own taste and preferences in music, but let’s be honest, some songs are just easier to dance to than others. A “danceable” song has a few key elements:
- A comfortable tempo/speed
- A clear beat or rhythm
- Consistency throughout (most) of the song
Comfortable tempo
Tempo is the speed of a song based. It’s how fast or slowly the beats are played. If you’re trying to dance together you’ll want a song that doesn’t make you feel rushed. Likewise, you also don’t want a song that’s so slow you feel like you’re trapped in slow motion.
Tempos can sometimes be deceiving. Many songs that sound slow actually have a faster tempo that can be difficult to dance to. This can happen when one of the instruments in the song sounds slow, but the instrument that’s actually keeping the beat is faster.
How do you know if a song has a good tempo? While professionals will often use a song’s BPM (beats per minute) or MPM (measures per minute) to determine if a song will work for them, one of the best ways to determine if the music is a comfortable speed is to get up and try dancing to it. This assumes you have a basic step in mind or at least some idea of how you want to dance to a song.
If you haven’t gotten this far I have good news. To save you time in picking music with a comfortable tempo, I’ve provided a list of songs I recommend that are good for first dances.
Clear beat or rhythm
The world of romantic music is filled with soft voices and delicate instruments, perfect for walks on the beach or spicing up your moves in the bedroom. But you’re going to want a song with a beat you can actually hear. Even better, you’re going to want a song with a beat the groom (or whoever’s leading) can actually hear.
Here’s a tip. A clear beat in modern music usually comes from the drums, percussion, or bass guitar. For example, a song with a clear beat is “We Will Rock You” by Queen.
But many romantic and slow songs don’t feature those instruments or have the feeling of stadium rock. Often you’re left with just a piano, guitar, or vocals. It can be challenging to dance to a song like this, and it can make it much harder for the leader to keep a steady time if they don’t have something to work with.
Consistency throughout (most) of the song
When my wife and I were married we chose a popular song for our wedding dance that an instructor friend helped us choreograph. As we were practicing, I noticed that for some reason the second half of the song was more difficult to dance to. I was getting tired and couldn’t complete my steps in time, and it wasn’t because of the extra wedding cakes I was sampling.
What none of us noticed was that the song was actually speeding up. It was just enough to NOT notice if you were listening to it in the car, but just enough to be a problem for our dance.
Having your song speed up or slow down is just one example of the kind of changes that can throw you off as a couple. Other examples include long introductions or endings, unexpected pauses, or just plain weird parts thrown into the middle of the song.
Our song is challenging to dance to, what do we do?
If you’re concerned about your song for any reason you have a few options before changing it altogether:
-Edit the song
Audio editing software can do almost anything these days. You can change the speed of a song, cut out parts you don’t want, and shorten or lengthen the duration. In the case of our wedding, I used software to slow the second half of the song down to match the tempo of the first part. Nobody noticed.
-Have your band or DJ make adjustments
DJs might be willing to edit the song for you or do modifications during your dance. Your bandleader can also make accommodations if you need to slow the pace down or do a shorter version.
Since your DJ (or bandleader) is an important part of the equation, make sure you read about how to DJ-proof your song once you’ve figured out your dance plan.
-Find an alternate version
If you really like the song you can always look for versions by other artists that may be easier to dance to.
-Change your song
If the above options won’t work for you then it’s worth considering a different song. And don’t worry, you can still make it an amazing experience without that one perfect song you were dreaming about. You’ll feel better about a dance that goes well, and your guests will appreciate seeing you enjoy yourselves.
I remember once trying to do a dance routine to a song that I thought was really kick-ass and that I knew would be a crowd-pleaser. After a few hours of struggling with our moves and having my partner complain that it wasn’t working, a colleague came over and said “dude, just change the song.”
We did, and although I liked the new song a lot less, the routine was much better and the audience went crazy for the performance.
Follow these tips to choose a fabulous wedding song, and you’ll be one step closer to rocking your wedding dance.
